I HATE DIABLO CODY

No, I am not justified in hating her. It is purely spite and jealousy. But as I sit here, forcing myself to do something I don't want to do (my thesis), so that I can get a degree in something that the Editorial Director of Playboy told me to my face will NOT forward my career, I can't help but think that there is a new law for aspiring intellectuals:

master's degree = bad career choice
stripper = good career choice

Oh why oh why did I pick the wrong one? Why did my dad push me towards higher education, when I could have sold my body to achieve my dreams?

Ms. Stripper Pen Name is doing what she loves, while my career lies fallow. And her success story really pisses me off -- it tells the world once again that in order for women to be recognized, they have to use their sexuality. Yes, Cody is smart, talented and hardworking in her own right. And Juno was a great movie. But does that not make her situation all the worse? If smart, talented, hardworking and funny women cannot have writing careers without showing skin, then what is left for the rest of us?

I found this photo on her myspace. Just look at her with that retro tattoo, milky cleavage and smug expression. What a bitch.

IN THE NEWS: Why none of us can get a job

Strangely enough, this article is the bridge between my former life (a cross between TV shows "The Office" and "Entourage") and my current one (too boring for television)...

And do you think it's depressing that this kind of entertainment is privileged in our society at the expense of good writing? I do.


television

A Unified Theory of The Hills

Pretending to be yourself isn't easy.

By Troy Patterson
Posted Tuesday, March 25, 2008, at 2:54 PM ET

---

The Hills (MTV) is about the lives—the square-one jobs, the rock-stupid romances, the pricey-looking highlights—of some young women living in greater Los Angeles. These are, principally, Lauren, Heidi, Whitney, and Audrina—though Audrina, being a brunette, might not really count. The Hills, one supposes, is the lives of these women in the most complete way that a television show could be. These are real people pretending to be themselves and making a virtue of banality. ... Read more>>

lost things or lost cause

Thanks to a kind fellow blogger, I discovered that Antony is the Saint of Lost Things. Unfortunately, when I finally reached his offices, his secretary referred me to St. Jude. As I walked down the block to Jude's office (all the saints' offices are lined up, kinda like embassy row), I assumed that St. Jude must be in charge of "success in education" or "extraordinary intellect and achievement" or at least "graduation gown fittings." But before I arrived, I saw the sign:

WELCOME to the offices of

St. Jude: The Patron Saint of Lost Causes
& Desperate SituationsPlease take a number.

I just walked away, dejected. No reason to bother a leader of a religion I don't even belong to. Back to studying I guess. ...

But wait ... a SIGN! In the middle of writing this very blog, my roommate's girlfriend found and delivered two of my long lost backpacks*! Maybe somebody is telling me to keep the faith.

*If you really must know, a year ago I lent the backpacks to her friends for a camping trip and the friends subsequently disappeared...

IN THE NEWS: $$$ for your academic expertise

No, it's not a pay-the-bills teaching gig...

I'm very curious to know if you guys think this is a positive or negative development. Will it help or harm people like us? I can't tell yet.

Writing for peanuts and loving it

By BRIAN BERGSTEIN
AP Technology Writer

In her spare time, away from her duties as a chemicals specialist in the Army, Angie Papple fires up her computer and writes an article about something close to her, like life in the military. Other times she'll analyze a piece of software. Or she'll churn out advice for travelers to Hawaii, where she lives, or Puerto Rico, where she's never been.

Some of these pieces bring her mere pocket change. The most lucrative ones earn about $40. Most of all, though, she's thrilled to be considered a writer. Read more>>

Readers Speak: Best Thesis-Writing Food

Thanks to all 15 of you who shared your opinions! I judge this poll a success.

Personally, I prefer cookie dough, but I must weigh that love against my hypochondria. Is the joy of eating raw eggs worth the paralyzing fear that my salmonella-infested insides fall out? I say YES! For posterity, here are your results:

Cookies	4 (26%)
cookie dough (contains raw eggs)	4 (26%)
broccoli & carrots (no ranch dip)	2 (13%)
whisky & cigarettes	5 (33%)

So where can I find my advisers blog?

The Professor as Open Book
By STEPHANIE ROSENBLOOM
The New York Times, March 20, 2008

IT is not necessary for a student studying multivariable calculus, medieval literature or Roman archaeology to know that the professor on the podium shoots pool, has donned a bunny costume or can’t get enough of Chaka Khan.

Yet professors of all ranks and disciplines are revealing such information on public, national platforms: blogs, Web pages, social networking sites, even campus television.

When scholars were recently given the chance to refute student criticism posted on the Web site RateMyProfessors.com, a cult-hit television series, “Professors Strike Back,” was born. The show, which has professors responding on camera to undergraduate gripes such as “boring beyond belief,” made its debut in October on mtvU, a 24-hour network broadcast to more than 7.5 million students on American college campuses. Read more, you lush>>

Thesis Progress: These song lyrics best describe the state of chapter 3: "She'll be comin' round the mountain when she comes, yee-haw."